Tuesday, July 10, 2012

My Husband, Quick Feet and One Bad Idea

Men are capable of accomplishing amazing feats of intelligence and organization….just not all the time. There are some times when men are driven by inexplicably strong impulses which evade reason and logic. For my wonderful husband, today was one of those times. I’m still wondering how we got from point A to the end of this incident… At point A my husband explained that he wanted to go to the Apple store at the mall to “see if they have those printers that will connect to my I-Phone or I-Pod.” That seems rational enough right? I was all, sure, go check it out, get the prices, MAYBE we should get a new printer. So we are at the mall with our two kids, one stroller , diaper bag and a few shopping bags.

My husband takes the 2 year old (who is determined to become the source of a Lifetime movie as she is always “escaping”) and goes to the Apple store while I feed our baby. Approximately 8 minutes later my husband and little miss quick feet return. Quick feet is running free screaming something at the top of her lungs- par for the course behavior for her. My husband, however, is carrying a box that appears to contain a printer. I can only assume the box is empty because I would never think that my husband would go and buy a brand new printer while we were shopping for kids clothes. I also assume the box is empty because if it were a real printer how would we carry it? It’s not in a cart of any sort and somebody has to push the stroller and somebody has to grab up quick feet so if that box contained a printer how would it survive our shopping trip?

I knew my “empty box” assumption was wrong when my husband was 5 feet away from me. Are you married? Do you have a close relationship with a man? If so, you will understand what I am about to tell you. My husband had that look on his face. It is a slightly goofy look with a hint of aggression. The look says ‘yeah I maybe did something a little crazy and no we didn’t talk about it but I’m grown and I work too so don’t try me.” You KNOW the look. So I give him back my ‘yeah that was crazy, no we didn’t discuss that purchase, yeah you are going to have to figure out how to carry a printer through the mall and if quick feet escapes and makes it into Lifetime fame because of this madness, I’m leaving you” look.

I’m not that wise. I don’t know what comes over good men. They can make 100 reasoned decisions but one day they will lose it and do something expensive and kinda crazy. BLANK STARE. When they dare you to say something about it my only advice to you is to think in the alternative (if you want to have a happy relationship). Say to yourself, hey at least he didn’t get a new I-Pad. If he got an I-Pad say hey at least he didn’t get a new laptop. If he got a laptop….say hey at least he didn’t get a car…..whatever gets you through the day with a smile. There aren’t that many good men and all of them have bad ideas from time to time, learn to cope.

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